The Story

When East meets West… when Lao Tzu wrote down the 81 verses of the Tao Te Ching 2,500 years ago in ancient China, he may not have realised the impact its philosophy would have millenniums later in the West and the newly-emerging profession of life-coaching.

When Julia from Taiwan met Nick from England on a coaching course, they didn’t realise at first that they had a common interest in the work of Lao Tzu. This joint interest soon became a course project. As we explored a few verses of the Tao, we began to see how Lao Tzu’s teachings could be related to personal development and coaching principles.

On this blog we intend to continue this work by exploring one verse of the Tao Te Ching each week. We invite you to join us on our journey and add your own thoughts to deepen our learning. How do you interpret Lao Tzu’s message? And how does it speak to you as a coach?

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Verse 42

The Tao gives birth to one.
One gives birth to two.
Two gives birth to three.
Three gives birth to ten thousand things.
The ten thousand things carry yin and embrace yang.
They achieve harmony by combining these forces.

Men hate to be "orphaned," "widowed," or "worthless,"
But this is how kings and lords describe themselves.
For one gains by losing,
and loses by gaining.

What others taught, I teach.
The violent do not die a natural death.
This is the essence of my teaching.

[For Personal Development]
  • When we accept our weaknesses and negative emotions/thoughts we are free to focus our attention on and embrace the positives.
  • Human nature is paradoxical as we are individuals, completely alone, yet we yearn for companionship and friendship.
  • Live by the sword, you die by the sword.

[For Coaching]

  • Gaining can lead to attachment and risk aversion. Losing can be liberating and lead to the freedom of detachment.
  • Give up the need to be right as a coach. Allow the client shows up vulnerable and fearful and you are not making them wrong for it. Be compassionate.
  • Break a vicious cycle by taking actions.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Verse 78

Nothing in the world is as soft and yielding as water.
Yet for dissolving the hard and inflexible,
nothing can surpass it.

The soft overcomes the hard;
the gentle overcomes the rigid.
Everyone knows this is true,
but few can put it into practice.

Therefore the Master remains serene in the midst of sorrow.
Evil cannot enter his heart.
Because he has given up helping,
he is people's greatest help.

True words seem paradoxical.

[For Personal Development]
  • Perseverance overcomes obstacles.
  • Athletes reach their peak state often when they are relaxed and alert, not when they are rigid and tense. Many martial art techniques must be applied with muscles relaxed, with softness, yielding, and flexibility.
  • Things that are weak have potential and room for more. Things that are strong have reached their maturation, exposed everything and showed all the negatives. Things that are weak will last longer. Things that are strong only last for a short time.

[For Coaching]

  • Stay centered and tranquil as a coach. Often static overcome dynamic, weak overcome strong and slow overcome fast.
  • Invite the client to let go of control in their life and relationships. It opens up a space for something new to come in and allow themselves to release the stress.
  • Our clients naturally creative, resourceful and whole. Coaching is not about trying so hard to “help”; it is partnering with the clients and help them to find their own answers.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Verse 79

After a bitter quarrel, some resentment must remain.
What can one do about it?
Therefore the sage keeps his half of the bargain
But does not exact his due.

A man of Virtue performs his part,
But a man without Virtue requires others to fulfil their obligations.
The Tao of heaven is impartial.
It stays with good men all the time.

[For Personal Development]
  • Someone must stop returning injury with injury or hostility will never end.
  • Recompense injury with justice, and recompense kindness with kindness [Confucius].
  • Tao is impartial. To the giver comes the fullness f life. To the taker, just an empty hand.

[For Coaching]

  • People who operate in the context of responsibility declare that they are accountable for their interpretations and behaviour. They are empowered by being the source of their own results.
  • Failure is an opportunity. If you blame someone else, there is no end to the blame.
  • To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you [Lewis B. Smedes]

Monday, February 1, 2010

Verse 5

The Tao doesn't take sides;
it gives birth to both good and evil.
The Master doesn't take sides;
she welcomes both saints and sinners.

The Tao is like a bellows:
it is empty yet infinitely capable.
The more you use it, the more it produces;
the more you talk of it, the less you understand.
Hold on to the center.

[For Personal Development]

  • The power of the Tao can be used in both positive and negative endeavours.
  • Step up and take the responsibility. The universe does not play favorites. Don’t play the victim and expect others to come to our rescue.
  • Living in harmony with the Tao, creates powerful synergies.
  • Understanding of the Tao is beyond the human mind, we can only feel the power.
  • You cannot fill a cup that's already full. To be receptive, empty the cup and open the mind.

[For Coaching]

  • Coaching is a powerful tool, be wary of the dark side!! Imposing your own agenda.
  • Unconditional positive regard is blanket acceptance and support of a person regardless of what the person says or does. It is essential to healthy development. [Carl Rogers].
  • Trust your intuition. Shifts often occurs heart-to-heart, not just head-to-head.